smack talking with the philosophers

Descartes: I asked your daddy if your mama was good looking, and he said, "I think not." And he disappeared! So you don't even have a daddy. But everybody's had your mama.

Freud: Tell me about your mama.

Sartre: Your mama died. In a café. At night. In the rain.

Camus: Sisyphus said, "I thought I was going to have to push this rock up a hill forever. And then I found out it was your mama."

Nietzsche: Your mama is dead.

Schrödinger: I shut the box and opened it again. And there was your mama!

Locke: In a natural state, your mama is so dumb, she tried to set the tabula rasa with Chinette.

Rousseau: In man's natural state, man is neither inherently good nor inherently bad. But then he saw your mama and decided inherently ugly.

Jefferson: That we are endowed with life, liberty and the pursuit of your mama.

Hume: She is ugly; therefore she is your mama.

Kant: She is your mama; therefore, she is ugly.

Hegel: Your mama is so fat she broke the dialectical cycle.

Plato: Your mama is so fat that when she sits around the cave, she eats the shadows.

Machiavelli: Your mama is so old she owes the Prince a buck.

Thoreau: I refuse to talk about your mama.

Kierkegaard: To have faith is to have doubt. So to have faith in God means you have to have some doubt that God exists. And that may be so, because I've seen your mama.

Ayn Rand: Man - all of mankind - is an end in himself, not the means to the ends of others. But your mama is so fat, this means she never ends.

Voltaire: If God didn't exist, man would invent him. That's because we've seen your mama.

Bacon: Knowledge is power. But the only power your mama has is in her armpits.

Schopenhauer: Denial of the will is attained by:
1. Knowing such great grief through experience that the will to live is gone;
2. Knowing that through the experiences of others people, life is tragedy; or
3. Knowing your mama.

see: http://denver.yourhub.com/Longmont/Blogs/Archive/Blog~342378.aspx for more :)